Ashley Update

I have finally gotten a little more information from my school district about Ashley's "incident" last week. After being passed from the school's assistant principal to a woman in Human Resources and finally to the school principal, here is what I found out:

• The school nurse and the school security officer were the ones who witnessed what happened and the ones who made the initial report to the school principal.
• There are cameras on the school campus but because they are often in the shade, they often don't supply usable footage
• There are no cameras in the classrooms, and no plans to put any in
• There are cameras in common areas where students congregate
• A report was filed with Child Protective Services, but neither the school staff nor I have heard anything from CPS
• The principal believes that removing Ashley's one-on-one aide from the school campus was the appropriate action to take, but can't tell me anymore than that because it is a "personnel issue."
• When the school principal is given more information, he will share it with me if he can

Not a lot, and you may notice that conspiciously missing from the list is how the actual injury occurred.

Here are a few of my thoughts:

• I have a great deal of respect for the school nurse and for Ashley's teacher. Just hearing that the nurse was the reporter made me feel better. I understand that she has probably been told not to share any information with me, and I don't want to ask her to jeopardize her job by doing so. But I can relax just a bit because I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that she and the teacher have Ashley's best interest at heart
• I have discussed everything with an attorney
• I will not wait much longer for a detailed explanation on how the injury happened

I thought Ashley has recovered both physically and emotionally from the injury, but now I am not so sure. Yesterday, I needed to take her for some blood work before our upcoming visit with her neurologist. She started crying the instant the tech touched her arm - and it was not the arm with the injury. When the tech and I tried to hold her arm, she completely freaked out. I tried to calm her but it didn't work. She was so distressed and worked up that at one point she bit me - hard. I know it was just a reaction but I also knew it was time to stop trying to get the blood.

So, was her reaction a result of what was done to her at school? I don't know, but I do know that blood draws have never been a problem before. She will usually hold her arm out, point to the vein, and then tell the tech "good job" when she is finished drawing the blood. Yesterday was a complete departure from that. And now I don't know what to do.

We've got to get bloodwork done to make sure her seizure meds are dosed appropriately and to make sure no liver damage is occurring, but I just can't put her through that again. Will time help? I don't know...

Don't Mess With The Best

My friend, Tammy Hodson, posted this on Facebook, and I just had to share it with you! Considering the things I have been experiencing trying to get information on how my daughter was hurt at school, this just couldn't be more timely. Perhaps I need to forward it to the folks at my school district that are refusing to provide me with information!

12 REASONS YOU SHOULD THINK TWICE BEFORE MESSING WITH SPECIAL NEEDS PARENTS:

1. Some of us have given up on social skills and don't care what we say or do.

2. We're not afraid to have a serious "meltdown" of our own.

3. We are tired and all the patience we have is for our kids.

4. We have A far shorter fuse for nonsense as a result of our responsibilities but A FAR thicker skin.

5. We can get you...in a hold/lockdown position in less than 3.5 secs.

6. We can shoot you a look that would make a linebacker tremble in his boots.

7. Chances are it's been a while since we've had a full night of sleep and that will give us a reason to plead insanity.

8. Our tolerance and patience is for our kids who didn't choose to have special needs, not for someone who CHOOSES to behave inappropriately and is ABLE to control their actions.

9. We're probably already on edge and it would be stupid to push us over.

10. We are sleep deprived and already defensive, and we spend all of our patience on our children, doctors, therapists, social workers and teachers, why would we waste an ounce of it on a total stranger?

11. We've had to fight from the moment of our child's birth, so by the time you piss us off we're seasoned battlers and could win a war.

12.We devote our lives to our children and don't need more stress and people who don't understand our life.

Special Exposure Wednesday

Then - puppy's first day home and all of 10 pounds....

And now - 10 months old and 80 pounds of furriness!

Impassioned Youth

Last Friday, I shared a video with you that was created by youth with disabilities in Virginia. Here are five more. Great job, guys!

A Week Later

It's been a week since Ashley was abused by a school staff person. A week during which the school district is refusing to tell me anything.

I know that the pediatrician filed a report with Child Protective Services, but every time I ask the school if they did, they won't answer me. I have asked verbally and in writing for an explanation on how the injury happened, and the only answer I get is that it is a personnel matter and they can't share anything with me.

Silly me, I thought it was a child abuse issue.

My latest email to Central Office (the place I was passed off to by the school principal) brought a response that said, "I am conducting a thorough investigation but because it is a personnel matter, I can't share anything with you."

I think it's time for a call to an attorney. What do you think?

(Ashley's arm is still bruised and a little swollen. Since it's been a week and it's still that way, you can imagine how bad the injury was....)

Choice

October is Disability History and Awareness Month in Virginia. Some young people who attended the 2012 Youth Summit and Youth Leadership forum are making public service announcements. Their first one is titled, "Choice."

Great job, guys, and I am really looking forward to the others!

The Amazing Raise

From 6am Wednesday until 6pm Thursday, you can help athletes like my son, Ronnie, by participating in the Amazing Raise, and pledging your support to Sportable.

Sportable is the organization behind Ronnie's wheelchair basketball team and lacrosse team. It is because of Sportable that Ronnie is able to play team sports in his wheelchair. Our school district, in fact most school districts, do not have organized sports programs for athletes with disabilities.

Sportable supports disabled athletes from ages 5 to 100+. Here is a quote from their website:

We don’t just provide adaptive sports and recreation opportunities in RVA –The reason Sportable exists is to transform the lives of people with physical and visual disabilities through sport! We know that is a bold claim and some might question whether we can really achieve that mission. Our response – come meet our athletes, hear their stories, watch them when they are in their “zone”. We can guarantee they would agree that in some way a transformation has occurred. This visionary approach to our mission allows us to keep pushing forward and aiming high—just as we ask of each of our athletes!

For a $50 donation, you can help ensure that this very important program continues, and that people like Ronnie can continue to participate in sports. Heck, the next star paralympian may already be in training at Sportable!

Please consider supporting Sportable during the Amazing Raise! Here is a link the more information and a contribution page:

Sportable Amazing Raise