We spent a lot of time out in the community during our four day holiday. The weather was beautiful, and we were all in the mood for Summer. During one of our outings, we visited our local produce market. It's a little bigger than a farmer's market, but nowhere near the size of a grocery store, and the fruits and vegetables are always the freshest in town.
While we were there picking up our blueberries, strawberries, oranges, apples, limes and corn, we really irritated a lot of people. Like I mentioned in an earlier post, we seem to annoy a lot of people because we are slow at times.
I understand that we move through places like a choo-choo train, two wheelchairs lined up, and everyone else in a single file also. I do that purposely so we don't block any aisles. But people still get annoyed, and the thing that I don't understand is why I feel the need to say I'm sorry to those impatient people.
Whenever I see "the look", I say "I'm sorry", and try even harder to minimize the space we all occupy. Why do I do that??? Why do I apologize just for existing, but that's what I feel like I am doing. If I hadn't already gone out of my way to be as considerate as possible, the "I'm sorry" might be an appropriate response, but I do go out of my way, even to the point of trying to pick times that fewer people are in the placed we need to go.
So, while we annoy people frequently, I am now annoying myself more. Neither I nor my children have anything to apologize for, and I need to remember that.
You are so very right. Luke has taught me many things. One of them is that going slow is OK. I have learned to (hopefully) gracefully tell other folks who are worried that THEY are going too slow (or what ever) that it doesn't bother us (not the words I use :-)
ReplyDeleteOn the opposite side of the coin for us -- I am in the process of learning that when his "autism speaks" I MUST listen and do what ever I can to move along quickly. I still haven't been able to ask if we can "cut" in line.
On the other hand...I use an electric scooter to get around. Every single time I say "excuse me" to somone in my way who hasn't noticed me they apologize. I don't know why it bothers me, but it does. Most of the time I am outside their line of vision and it's not their fault.
ReplyDeleteGreat words - no reason to be sorry at all.
ReplyDeleteyou need a shirt that says we;re here, we`re slow, we`re single file, move around us, get used to it, all in a snappy way of course!!!
ReplyDeletedeafDalya
I have anxiety and panic attack disorder and one thing I cannot stand is other people in the aisle with me who are rushing me or trying to get to whatever I'm looking at. I get frustrated with people who encrouch upon my space or stand there impatiently. So in my head there's a string of explitives but out of my sweet Canadian mouth comes the standad "sorry about that" and I move out of the way usually to some other aisle where I don't even want to be just so I can calm down. So yes I know exactly what you are saying and I'm not even that slow moving.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait until Skyler needs a cane or a guide dog. A week ago there was a story in our local newspaper about a blind woman who was at McDonalds with her guide dog and was told to leave by the MANAGER because the dog would offend their customers. Idiot. It was a violation of human rights and I think they will have to pay a fine, but it made me want to find this person and give them a huge lecture..
All I can say is what next?