Friday, September 14, 2007

Space Bugs From Hell

I am usually a very strong person. I was going to write fearless, but that’s not exactly accurate. I may appear fearless, but really I am just good at appearing. But, there is one thing about which I cannot hide my fear – camel crickets. They are the Devil’s spawn, and I wish they all would die a hideous death equal to the terror I experience when I spot one.

I have a friend who is a ‘bug man’. I believe he would prefer to be called an entomologist, but nonetheless, he likes all those creatures I hate. He tells me every insect plays a role in nature, but all I could find on the Internet about camel crickets is that they can’t sing and they like to eat fine fabrics. Based on that information, I think we could do without them.

This is the time of year the nasty little arthropods start to invade my home. They are looking for warmth and moisture. I’ll give them warmth and moisture – hot insecticide! My cats view them as toys, loving the way they jump helter skelter in any direction imaginable. That jumping is what frightens me the most, and it seems they always decide to jump right into me to elicit the loudest squeal possible.

And take a look at them. They look prehistoric. One of the reasons I had to keep closing my eyes during the Men In Black movies is that several of the aliens looked very much like camel crickets. I’m still not convinced that the crickets are merely insects and not aliens come to invade my home.

Devil’s spawn, I tell you…..

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