I Do

As a parent, do you ever feel like you should be doing more for your children?

I do.

Do you wish you had more time and more energy, and do you worry that your lack of those two things will have an extremely negative effect on them?

I do.

Do you wonder what your children see when they look at you? Do you wonder if it good or not so good?

I do.

Do you worry that they may not completely understand your decisions to fight the battles you feel are important to their health and well-being?

I do.

Do you sometimes feel like you might not be fighting the right battles - that perhaps you are focusing on the wrong things?

I do.

Do you think they resent that you are at their school so often, talking to staff and administrators, and that perhaps they would just rather you be at home with them?

I do.

Do you worry that they are tired of seeing you challenge doctors and nurses, even if the challenge is in your child's best interest?

I do.

Do you think they feel the deep abiding love you have for them when you are fighting 'systems'?

I do.

Do you set your health and well-being aside so that your every thought and action is related to making them happy and prepared for a life without you?

I do.

Even though you are completely drained and exhausted beyond words, do you still have a tough time saying 'No' when someone asks for help, help you know you have the expertise to provide?

I do.

Do you look at other children - foster children, homeless children, children not receiving what you think they deserve - and want deep down in your heart to take them all home with you? Do you feel utterly depressed that you can't make the world a better place for them?

I do.

Do your fear your child's death before your own, but then also wonder what will become of them if you are no longer there to take care of them?

I do.

Does your heart just ache sometimes because you can't take away all the pain and rejection your children will encounter?

Mine does.

Do you pray for answers and strength to keep going when somedays you would just rather curl into the fetal position under your bed covers?

I do.

And do you feel that all you do accomplish is 'worth it'?

I do and it is, it really is....